Paddy
Patrick 'Paddy' O'shea is one of two protagonists in Max and Paddy's Road to Nowhere. He is played by Paddy McGuiness. Paddy formerly worked with Max as a bouncer at the Phoenix Nights Club in Bolton. Max was paid by a woman to kill her husband, but when he failed, she threatened to kill him and Paddy, too. Paddy decided to run away with Max in his motorhome, and the pair travelled the UK. Biography Early Life Paddy was born in 1973 in England. As a youngster, Paddy was said to be 'spazzy' due to having to wear callipers and a brace. He was sometimes babysitted by the sister of Kevin Wolfson, a close friend of Paddy's future best friend, Max. Paddy was always being dirty by sticking his Star Wars figures up his anus. One time, he had to be taken into casualty, because of this. This proves that Paddy was sexualy active at a young age. Working as a bouncer Paddy started working as a bouncer at the Phoenix Nights club around about 1999, when Billy Shannon was sent to prison. Paddy became good friends with fellow bouncer, Max. In 2002, Max was paid by a woman to kill her husband. Both Max and Paddy found they were unable to carry out the hit, and Max paid the man £3000 to leave the country. Paddy was paid £1000 and Max spent the remaining £4000 on a motorhome. The woman was furious when she found that they failed to carry out the hit, and wanted Max and Paddy killed instead. Paddy was cross to hear that Max had cheated him with the money, but he wanted to escape Bolton with Max, and the pair hit the road in their motorhome. Life on the road In 2004, Paddy arrived in Dover, Kent with Max. They wanted to buy a plasma TV, although they soon found out that the TV had no speakers. The pair went clubbing to forget their troubles, although Paddy had no luck with the young women, due to his forward approach. Later, Max and Paddy disguised as sailors were able to pull a couple of girls. Unfortunately, they stole Paddy's walet. After learning the identity of the girls as the 'Belgrano Sisters', they did a deal with them to steal them a pair of speakers. Shortly afterwards, Paddy applied to star in a porn film, but he soon found out to his horror that it was a homosexual porn film. Paddy quit in disgust, but the motorhome soon broke down. As they were technically homeless while their motorhome was being fixed, Paddy reluctantly came with Max on a ramble through the woods. They ended up having to spend the night there, and Paddy offended Max by burning his drawings. The pair soon made up and Paddy learned about Max's former girlfriend, Tina. The next morning, Paddy had to help Max steal back their vehicle, as the mechanic was overcharging them. They soon broke down again. While in London, Paddy attended Max's old friend, Kevin 'Wolfster' Wolfson's 40th birthday party. Wolfster embarassed Paddy by telling Max about when his sister used to babysit Paddy. At the party, Max met Tina, who told him that she is now married to Wolfster, and that she had a son with Max, 10 years before, named Daniel. Tina begged Max to stay away, as Wolfster thought he was Daniel's dad. Paddy was made to come with Max to meet Daniel, and helped to hijack the school bus. After learning that Daniel was not on the bus, Max and Paddy were quickly arrested and sent to prison on remand. Prison While in prison, Paddy was put in a cell with a Cliff Richard impersonator. Paddy's first night inside was difficult as he was forced to listen to his cellmate singing 'The Millennium Prayer'. The next morning, Max reassured Paddy that the best way to get through prison was to pretend they were career criminals. At breakfast, Paddy came to the defence of a fellow inmate and hit another inmate in the face with a metal tray. In the showers, Max and Paddy were confronted by Raymond 'the Bastard', who unofficial runs the prison. Raymond made a deal with the pair that since they claimed to have pulled off a big job, he wanted half the loot. After this, Max and Paddy started living the life of luxury, until Brian Potter organised a benefit to free them. This exposed them as doormen. Since Raymond found out the pair had lied to them, he was about to kill them, when Max and Paddy were called back to court. It turned out that Tina had told the police that Max was Daniel's dad, and hence, they were not dangerous criminals after all. After being freed, Max and Paddy got their revenge on Potter by informing the Home Office that Potter was keeping biological weapons at his club. Pig incident After being released, Paddy and Max were driving through the countryside, when Paddy accidentally hit a cow. They were giving a pig as compensation by an eccentric farmer. They soon found out that the pig was a retired breeder, and hence, useless. They tried to sell the pig to butchers for meat, but they were unsuccessful. They ended up having to return the pig to the farm. Cutting down the speed camera and meeting Billy Shannon While on the road, Paddy and Max were listening to Status Quo at high volume, when they got flashed by a speed camera. The pair decided to take a stand and Paddy cut down the speed camera, while other drivers contragulated them. Max helped Paddy to throw the camera over a hedge and then they drove off. On a trip to Newcastle, Max wanted to meet his old friend, Billy Shannon, who had recently been released from prison. Paddy was not keen to meet Billy as he knew that he was jailed for stabbing his care worker with a potato peeler. Max told Paddy that Billy was a changed man, and reminded Paddy that if Billy wasn't sent to jail, Paddy wouldn't be with Max. When they met, Billy took an instant dislike to Paddy for stealing his position as Max's best friend. The pair traded insults and nearly came to blows, so it was up to Max to try and keep the peace between them. Later, Billy cadged a lift on their motorhome, and they called in at a Little Chef restaurant. Billy held the lady working there at gunpoint and forced her to cook for them. The next morning, Paddy discovered about the robbery and also that Billy had pasted his face over Paddy's in a photograph. Billy was furious that Paddy had been going through his stuff and chased after him, eventually shooting Paddy in the bottom. Paddy was only wounded and knocked out Billy before he could shoot Max too. The pair were excused by the police and Max drove Paddy to hospital to have the bullet removed. Physical description Paddy is a tall man in his early 30s with black hair. Although he was teased by Max about going bald, Paddy's hair is not thinning at all, it was actually Max's. Also, Paddy is a lot thinner than Max and is the better looking one of the two. Personality Paddy is a cheeky and likely lad who is obsessed with sex, pornography and food. He is quite insensitive in contrast to Max. Although, Paddy does have some morals, as he was openly disgusted with Billy 'the Butcher' Shannon for his previous crimes. Another difference between Max and Paddy is that Paddy sees personal hygiene as important, and spends a lot of money on deodorants and shower gel. Paddy is known for saying strange, but funny catchphrases like "Ding Dang Doo". While in prison, Paddy was described as being like a young Burt Reynolds by hardened criminal Raymond 'the Bastard'. Category:Road to Nowhere Characters Category:Phoenix Nights Characters Category:Males Category:Bouncers Category:Criminals